He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. - 2 Corinthians 1:4 NLT
As a widow, I know how important love and support can be during a loss. When my husband died suddenly, it was one of the worst times of my life. I had trouble doing simple things like grocery shopping, making meals, and washing the cars. However, the Lord used my family, friends, and church community to comfort us during our season of grief.
When I think of all the things that people did to offer their love and support, there are five that helped me through the initial grief.
Prayer: Remember to pray for your loved ones. The peace of God met us each time someone came to pray for my family and me. Their commitment to prayer reminded us to rely on the Lord for healing and hope. This essential help took the pressure off them and allowed the Lord to have control of the moment. It was comforting to have others support us in prayer (Philippians 4:6-7).
Presence: One friend would show up weekly with food, flowers, and a smile. She did not try to fix my mood or use words to stop my grief. She showed up. Knowing that someone cared enough to check on me regularly and sit with me during my lowest moments brought peace (Galatians 6:2).
Provision: Try to provide practical help for your loved one. The tangible gifts of food and services were a blessing. People cared enough to pay attention to what was not getting done and offered practical help. What made it even more meaningful was the servant's heart with which each person gave. These blessings reminded me that God would care for us and that we were not alone (Hebrews 13:16).
Patience: Take some time to learn about healthy grief and allow your loved ones to pursue healing at their own pace. Everyone grieves differently. My friends and family were willing to slow down and even put their plans on pause to make room for my process. They didn't put any expectations on us. It takes sacrifice and genuine faith to trust God to help our loved ones along the path of grief (Ephesians 4:2).
Priority: Show your loved ones they are your priority. I have never felt such love and care from others as I did from those that knew how to help in ways that mattered more to me than to them. It was not about their desire to feel helpful, but about how well their care brought comfort and healing to our pain (Philippians 2:3-4).
Dig Deeper
- Reach out to your grieving loved one and ask what three ways you can pray for them this week. Then search for Scriptures about grief and loss and encourage them with what God’s Word says.
- Read Hebrews 13:16, Ephesians 4:2, and Philippians 2:3-4. How can God use you to prioritize the needs of your loved ones and supply practical support for them while they are grieving? List four things you can do to support your loved one in their grief.
